Ask Dr. Politics! You are fair, and we are unbalanced!
Dear Dr. Politics: There is no sugarcoating it. The website has been working too slowly. I think it’s fair to say nobody is more upset than I am. Can you help the surge of the best and the brightest to fix the Obamacare site? Asking for a friend.
Answer: First, is your Wi-Fi router on? A lot of people forget this. They also can’t remember where their Wi-Fi router is. Yours may be in the Situation Room or in the bowling alley or underneath Joe Biden.
Second, restart your computer. But back up all the data for the entire government first. This should take no more than two or three years.
Third, are you using a laptop? If you are — and we suspect it’s a Radio Shack TRS-80 Model 100 — make sure the modem is working. That is the thing that goes: SQUEE-AWK ... SQUEE-AWK ... PING-PING-PING ... GRSHHHHHHH.
If you don’t hear that sound when you dial in, replace the four AA-cell batteries in the laptop. This could fix your problem, or it could trigger a nuclear launch. So be careful. Maybe you should let one of the kids do it.
Fourth, clear your cache. Those scamps from the press corps may be sneaking in to use your computer and leaving cookies behind. Consider blocking all sites that contain the words “Kardashian,” “Miley Cyrus” and “Cruz.”
Fifth, have you considered selling Obamacare door-to-door? It works great for Avon. Or you could do home parties like Mary Kay. Wouldn’t getting a pink Cadillac be totally cool?
Sixth, call Snowden.
Seventh, buy a Mac.
Dear Dr. Politics: I keep hearing that Ted Cruz, a Republican senator from Texas, may run for president in 2016. I also hear he was born in Canada and is a Canadian citizen. Doesn’t the Constitution demand that a president be a “natural born Citizen” of the United States? So how could Cruz run?
Answer: Ted Cruz’s birth certificate, which was released to The Dallas Morning News at its request in August, shows three important things:
First, Rafael Edward Cruz (now called Ted) was born Dec. 22, 1970, in Calgary, Alberta, Canada.
Second, his father, Rafael Bienvenido Cruz, was born in Matanzas, Cuba.
Third, and this is very important, his mother, Eleanor Elizabeth Wilson, was born in Wilmington, Del.
At birth, Cruz became a citizen of Canada because he was born there, but he also became a “natural born” citizen of the United States, in the view of many legal experts, because his mother was a U.S. citizen. According to the newspaper, Cruz’s father came to the United States from Cuba in 1957 and remained a Cuban citizen until he became a naturalized U.S. citizen in 2005. (He was working in Canada as a “geophysical consultant” at the time of Ted’s birth.)
The family returned to the United States when Ted was 4. Catherine Frazier, Cruz’s Senate press secretary, told the Dallas paper that Cruz’s mother registered his birth with the U.S. Consulate and that Cruz got a U.S. passport without a problem in 1986 to make a high-school trip to England. “To our knowledge, he never had Canadian citizenship,” Frazier said.
The Dallas Morning News found a number of experts on Canadian and immigration law, however, who said Cruz definitely had dual citizenship with Canada. After the story appeared, Cruz issued a statement saying that he would renounce his Canadian citizenship if he “technically” ever had it. “Nothing against Canada,” he said, “but I’m an American by birth and as a U.S. senator, I believe I should be only an American.”
Cruz also said: “Given the raft of stories today about my birth certificate, it must be a slow news day.”
Yeah, well, Barack Obama had a birth certificate proving he was born in the United States, but the “birther” wackos still tried to claim he was born in Kenya, making him ineligible to be president. Except it wouldn’t have made him ineligible.
Using the legal argument that now helps Cruz, Obama would have been a “natural born” citizen of the United States even if he had been born in Kenya, because his mother was a U.S. citizen. (In any case, Obama was born in Honolulu.)
So, in the opinion of Dr. Politics, Cruz is a “natural born” U.S. citizen and could legally become president of the United States.
Unless Donald Trump can’t find his mother’s birth certificate.
Dear Dr. Politics: I hear that Congress keeps “kicking the can down the road.” Why would anyone kick a can? And why would he do it down the road, where he could get run over?
Answer: “Kick the can” was a popular game in the early years of last century and still is played by members of Congress. The way Congress plays it, one member is stuffed into a large aluminum trash can, and the others kick it repeatedly as it rolls around the roads on Capitol Hill. At the end of a half-hour or so, the member emerges from the can so discombobulated that he will vote for or against anything. This is called “party discipline” or “the end of democracy as we know it.”
Ask Dr. Politics! You are fair, and we are unbalanced!
The Case of the Unhappy Robber
Norton, a professional burglar, looked upon himself as a kind of Robin Hood. The difference was that he took from the rich and kept it for himself. As a result, he spent more time in the slammer than he did in Sherwood Forest.
The toughest blow he suffered, however, was inflicted by the commissioner of motor vehicles. Upon Norton’s release from jail for the umpteenth time, the hard-hearted commissioner revoked his driver’s license.
Dream becomes reality only when you persevere
A young boy grew up in Berea, in a family that was blessed with a variety of musical talents.
His mother was a member of a female group who performed onstage regularly at Renfro Valley, in Rockcastle County.
This young man would routinely attend shows to watch his mother, and other artists, perform on stage. He was eager to learn from them every chance he could. He knew from a young age he wanted to pursue a career in the music industry and was willing to seek advice and mentoring from those who were experienced in the industry.
SOAR-ing in eastern Kentucky
By the time many of you read this, I’ll be traveling to southeastern Kentucky, on my way to the SOAR Summit scheduled for Monday in Pikeville (at least if the weather cooperates).
I’ll be listening to WMMT radio out of Whitesburg, the world’s most eclectic radio station. I’ll be among those magic mountains and with the wonderful people who live in the region and others who don’t but still love it.
If you don’t know eastern Kentucky, get rid of your stereotypes right now. Yes, there are poor, ignorant people in eastern Kentucky — just as there are in New York City, San Francisco or London, England.
Farming Misunderstood and Under-appreciated
As you look at your (I hope) full plate this Thanksgiving, take a guess at what percentage of your annual income you spend on food.
Whatever you guessed, you probably guessed too high.
“We pay as low as 6 percent,” Tom Vilsack, the secretary of agriculture, tells me at a conference table in his office. “In most other industrialized countries, it’s 20-25 percent.”
And if you were spending that much on food in America, Vilsack asks, “how big a house would you have? How nice a car?”
Recalling the day JKF died
This is written on the 50th anniversary of President John F. Kennedy’s assassination. A year ago I demonstrated my exquisite sense of timing: I wrote my personal remembrance of that dark day in Dallas last year on the 49th anniversary of the horrific events in Dealey Plaza.
Is the pipeline to career advancement broken?
“Honey, have you checked our financials this month?” An individual asks their spouse.
“Yes, and it’s not looking good. Our investments aren’t growing like we’d hoped, and the healthcare crisis is affecting the premiums and co-pays we’re paying every month,” replies the spouse.
The individual asks another question, “Do you think we’ll ever be able to retire?”
The spouse shakes their head and replies, “It doesn’t appear we’ll have that option anytime soon, especially if we want to maintain the lifestyle we have now.”
Life Lessons from lawyers, journalists and 10 years as a columnist
I have little in common with Walter White, the chemistry teacher turned drug lord in the TV series Breaking Bad, but the line about his motivation hit me.
In the decade that I wrote a weekly column, I touched a lot of lives.
At least one man stopped his planned suicide and got help after reading my column. (I still hear from him and he is doing fine.)
Register columnists share room for a day at Telford rehab center
So here we are, coming to you still alive from Telford Terrace Rehabilitation Center in Richmond where I am recovering from two strokes that kept me in St. Joseph’s Lexington Hospital for the better part of last week.
I was transferred to Telford where I intend to learn to walk again.
Memo to Merkel: Tell Obama to Take a Hike
Chutzpah. I believe that’s the word for it.
Just days after learning the Americans have been tapping her phones and taping her conversations, Angela Merkel has been publicly upbraided by the U.S. Treasury for being a bad global citizen.
What did she do to deserve this?
Congressionally Duped Americans
Last week’s column, “Is There a Way Out?”, generated quite a few responses, some a bit angry. Some people were offended by my reference to Social Security and Medicare as entitlements or handouts. They said that they worked for 45 years and paid into Social Security and Medicare and how dare I refer to the money they now receive as an entitlement. These people have been duped by Congress and shouldn’t be held totally accountable for such a belief. Let’s examine the plethora of congressional Social Security lies. I’ll leave the Medicare lies for another column.
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