I was just thinking the other day about how smart kids are, but how funny some of their ideas are. If you stop and think about these, they actually make sense.
A lady rolled her elderly father in a wheelchair into the waiting room of a physician’s office. She left him and walked to the reception desk. As she was doing that, a small boy walked over to the man’s wheelchair, placed his hand on the man’s hand and said to him, “I know how you feel. My mom sometimes makes me ride in a stroller too.”
A grandmother was out bicycling with her 8-year-old granddaughter. She looked over at the child and said, “In ten years you’ll want to be with your friends and won’t go walking, biking and swimming with me like you do now.”
The child shrugged and answered, “In ten years you’ll be too old to do all those things anyway.”
A pediatric nurse was giving immunization shots to children. She started to give -year-old Lizzie her shot, and Lizzie screamed, “No, No, No.”
“Lizzie,” scolded her mother, “that’s not polite.”
With that, the girl yelled even louder, “No, thank you! No thank you!”
A dad and his son were in the car returning from a Cub Scout meeting. The boy innocently said to his dad, “Dad, I know babies come from Mommie’s tummies, but how do they get there in the first place?”
Dad hemmed and hawed awhile and the boy finally spoke again.
“Dad, you don’t have to make up something, it’s okay if you don’t know the answer.”
Just before a soldier was deployed to Iraq, he sat his 8-year-old son down and told him, “Son, I’m going to away for a long time. I’m going to Iraq.”
The boy replied, “Why do you want to go there, don’t you know there’s a war going on over there?”
The actor Paul Newman founded the Hole-in-the-Wall Camp for children stricken with cancer, AIDS or blood diseases. One day, he and his wife Joanne Woodward stopped to have lunch with the children. A counselor at a nearby table, suspecting the young patients wouldn’t know Newman was a famous movie star, explained, “That’s the man who made this camp possible. Maybe you’ve seen his picture on his salad dressing bottle.”
“Well, you’ve probably seen his face on his lemonade carton?”
An 8-year-old girl spoke up.
“How long were you missing?”
- Lifestyles & Community
Bee on the lookout as beekeepers convene
Summer vacation season is in full swing, and I had the pleasure of spending the last week and a half filling in at the Farm Store while the store manager, Bethany Pratt, got a welcome respite soaking up the beauty of Ireland.
Cicada-killer wasps are here
The extension office has received numerous phone calls over the past couple of weeks about large wasps hovering in yards all over the county.
This insect is called the cicada killer, and despite its aggressive name, it is not something to be scared of.
Converting from year-round calving to a controlled breeding season
Maintaining a controlled breeding and calving season can be one of the most important management tools for cow-calf producers.
Uniform, heavier and more valuable calves are key reasons to keep the breeding season short.
Paper boys learned life, business lessons
I often flash back to the days from the mid to late 1930s when I was a paper boy.
There were 10 or 12 of us who rolled out of bed at 5 a.m. every day, jumped on our bicycles and headed downtown to the Glyndon Hotel and picked up our papers for delivery.
Here’s why teachers aren’t paid enough
The following were included in last year’s exams and were answered by 16-year-old high school students. The answers are genuine, and we must remember that these youngsters will grow up to vote, marry and become parents. It’s a scary thought.
4-H exhibits are family affair for the Houstons
Five children from the same family were the first to bring their 4-H exhibits Wednesday to the Madison County Fairgrounds.
Band students ‛take over’ MCHS campus
The Madison Central High School campus has been “taken over” for two weeks by 170 students attending band camp.
Warning labels needed on energy drinks
The popularity of energy drinks has soared since they entered the marketplace, but at least one consumer group wants the FDA to order warnings on product labels.
Full Gospel ‛Back to School Bash’ is Aug. 2
I guess everyone is asking, “How much rain did we get?”
Thank the Lord for the rain
Hello readers, it’s a stormy Monday evening as I write this, and I’ve been thanking the Lord all day for the good rain – over an inch in the gauge now, and it looks like more before morning.
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- Bee on the lookout as beekeepers convene