I was just thinking the other day about what an adventure eating can be for seniors.
First of all, we try to eat things that are good for us. Then we eat out on occasion and that can really be an adventure.
An audience of seniors was attending a lecture by a health care expert. A part of her lecture included:
“The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode our stomach lining. Some exotic foods are loaded with MSG. High-fat diets are disastrous. There are numerous germs in our drinking water. However, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all. Can anyone tell me which food causes the most grief and suffering for years?
After several seconds of silence, a 75 year old man raised his hand and softly said, “Wedding cake.”
Many of us have discovered the “A” diet. It is designed to make us healthy and dictates that we eat only foods that begin with the letter “a,” a steak, a hamburger, a hotdog, a large order of French fries, a large ice cream sundae, etc.
When we were young, we came home at the end of a work day and asked, “What’s cooking?” Now we ask, “What’s thawing?”
We’ve also discovered the best way to lose weight. We eat all we want of everything we don’t like.
An elderly couple noticed an advertisement in their local newspaper. A small diner was offering a special $2.99 breakfast. It was for two eggs, bacon, hash browns, gravy and a biscuit.
The husband said, “That sounds almost too good to be true, I think we need to try it.”
The wife agreed so they got up one morning and made their way to the diner.
The waitress came to their table and the wife told her she would like to have the $2.99 special, but she said, “I don’t like eggs so leave them off.
The waitress replied, “Then I’ll have to charge you $3.49.”
“Do you mean I must pay extra for not taking eggs?” the wife said.
“Yes, that means you are ordering a la carte and that is more expensive,” the waitress said.
“Alright, let me have the special as is,” the wife told her.
“How do you want your eggs?” The waitress asked.
“Raw and in the shell,” the wife explained.
She took the eggs home and used them to bake a cake.
Don’t mess with seniors! We’ve been around the block more than once.
Two old men were having breakfast at a diner. “I went out with Rachel last night,” one said.
“How’d that go?” The other asked.
“She made me feel like I was 17 again,” the first man said.
“Excited and full of love?” The other asked.
“No, totally ignored and home by nine.”
Something we’ve discovered. The older we get the harder it is to lose weight.
The reason is, our bodies and our fat have become good friends.
TRIVIA ANSWER – The country singer who has a parkway named for him in his hometown of Hendersonville, Tenn., is Johnny Cash. Nancie and I lived in Hendersonville for 16 years. During that time I got to know Johnny. We were members of the same church, and he did a benefit concert for our high school band.
TRIVIA QUESTION — On April 14, 1987, nearly 120,000 visited what branch of the Smithsonian, the one day record for any museum?
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY — Old Age: A socially acceptable excuse to call your friends by the wrong name — Dan Polydoris
- Lifestyles & Community
Victory through Stratagems: the Allied Invasion of Normandy France on June 6th 1944
Dr. Ralph Thompson a former chemistry professor at Eastern Kentucky University spoke on the “Deceptions of WWII” to the Central Kentucky World War II Roundtable.
When will the ordeal finally be over?
I was just thinking about the ordeal I’ve been going through since Sept. 19.
Life in Stringtown was full of hard work, simple pleasures
I had a chance to visit recently with an old friend, Alene Perkins Long.
Burning bridges and the importance of relationships
“Congratulations on your new job!” You tell a co-worker who announced she would be leaving in a couple of weeks. “Where are you going?” You ask her.
“I’ve landed a job that will put this place to shame! I am so excited about leaving here. This is going to be a great chance to advance my career,” the co-worker tells you.
Ensuring children develop a habit brushing their teeth
“Are you sure you brushed your teeth?” the father asked his son. His son solemnly nodded. His father said, “Let me smell your breath.” The son obligingly opened his mouth. Finally, the father said, “I need to check and see if your toothbrush is wet.”
This type of exchange happens in many households as children often do not brush their teeth, even when told to do so. This nightly inquisition can occur less frequently if parents establish a habit in their children to brush their teeth.
Saturated fat consumption leads to abdominal fat
New research from Uppsala University shows that eating more saturated fat in the diet causes an increase in the amount of fat stored in the abdominal area in comparison with extra consumption of polyunsaturated fat.
County’s oldest consignment sale begins today
The Little Ones’ Consignment Sale, Madison County’s oldest semi-annual sale of its kind, is open to the public 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. today (Friday) and 8 a.m. to noon Saturday at the multi-ministry center behind United Methodist Church, West Main Street, Richmond. Marked items are half price on Saturday.
There’s more to do at the Village Trough
“I wish there was more to do here.”
Do you ever find yourself saying this sentence as you sit there bored out of your mind? Have you heard others ask it?
Well, there is something more to do now that Village Trough in Berea is staging shows with local and regional talent and preparing to open as a full dining and entertainment venue.
Let’s have a Mardi Gras party in Kentucky
It’s the time of year when the people in New Orleans celebrate a festival called Mardi Gras. Many states now do the same. Some call it “Fat Tuesday” which I have never understood till I went to New Orleans (five times) and saw all of the excitement for myself.
Beat the winter blues with meatballs
When it’s this cold outside it’s nice to warm up with some good comfort food.
I can think of few things more wonderful than the smell of simmering meatballs coming from the kitchen while I cuddle with my two young children, and a few good books, on a brisk winter day.
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- Victory through Stratagems: the Allied Invasion of Normandy France on June 6th 1944