The Richmond Register

Lifestyles & Community

April 14, 2014

We old folks have unique experiences


A friend sent this to me by e-mail, and I thought my readers would enjoy it.

A young lady was jogging one day in her neighborhood when she passed a house with an exceptionally well-kept flower garden. She slowed down to admire the colorful, fragrant blooms. Peeking through the yard’s picket fence, she spied an elderly lady kneeling in one of the beds.

The jogger stopped and called, “Good morning,” to the gardener. “I just want to say how much I admire your garden.”

“Well,” the elderly woman frowned as she pulled herself up, “it’s getting harder and harder to take care of, you know.”

“But you do a beautiful job,” the jogger called.

“Not like I used to,” The woman shook her head and frowned. “My arthritis kicks in, and I just can’t get to everything I want to do. You should have seen it 20 years ago.

The young woman persisted in her praise for the gardener whose handiwork brightened the entire block.

The gardener, not to be budged from her negative attitude continued to air her complaints. Finally the jogger broke in. “Well, you have to admit,” she said with a smile, “it’s better to be up here on earth looking down on the flowers than to be under the earth staring at their roots.”

Because they had no reservations at a busy restaurant, an elderly man and his wife were told there would be a 45 minute wait for a table.

“Young man, we’re both 90 years old,” the husband said. We may not have 45 minutes.”

They were seated immediately.

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn’t it follow that electricians could be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?

Bubba came running into the store and said to his buddy Earl, “Somebody stole your pickup from the parking lot.”

Earl asked Bubba, “Did y’all see who it was?”

Bubba answered, “No, but I got the license number.”

It’s a sure sign your age is showing when:

• People start telling you how good you look

• History students start interviewing you for eye-witness reports

• You’re not ticketed for speeding but pulled over for driving too slow.

After the elderly couple arrived at the lake for a weekend away, the wife exclaimed, “Oh honey! We must go back home right now! I’m afraid I left the iron on and it will start a fire.”

“Don’t worry abut it dear,” the husband replied, “I just remembered I left the water running in the kitchen sink.”


On March 10, 1971 the U.S. Senate lowered the voting age to 18.


What historic event took place on January 31, 1958?


“Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.

— Victor Hugo


Text Only
Lifestyles & Community
  • Bee on the lookout as beekeepers convene

    Summer vacation season is in full swing, and I had the pleasure of spending the last week and a half filling in at the Farm Store while the store manager, Bethany Pratt, got a welcome respite soaking up the beauty of Ireland.

    July 30, 2014

  • Amanda-Sears-c.jpg Cicada-killer wasps are here

    The extension office has received numerous phone calls over the past couple of weeks about large wasps hovering in yards all over the county.
    This insect is called the cicada killer, and despite its aggressive name, it is not something to be scared of.

    July 29, 2014 1 Photo

  • Brandon-Sears-c.jpg Converting from year-round calving to a controlled breeding season

    Maintaining a controlled breeding and calving season can be one of the most important management tools for cow-calf producers.
    Uniform, heavier and more valuable calves are key reasons to keep the breeding season short.

    July 29, 2014 1 Photo

  • 7-29 Nostalgia-Glenmore.jpg Paper boys learned life, business lessons

    I often flash back to the days from the mid to late 1930s when I was a paper boy.
    There were 10 or 12 of us who rolled out of bed at 5 a.m. every day, jumped on our bicycles and headed downtown to the Glyndon Hotel and picked up our papers for delivery.

    July 28, 2014 1 Photo

  • Dick-Ham.jpg Here’s why teachers aren’t paid enough

    The following were included in last year’s exams and were answered by 16-year-old high school students. The answers are genuine, and we must remember that these youngsters will grow up to vote, marry and become parents. It’s a scary thought.

    July 28, 2014 1 Photo

  • 7-24 4-H Entries 1.jpg 4-H exhibits are family affair for the Houstons

    Five children from the same family were the first to bring their 4-H exhibits Wednesday to the Madison County Fairgrounds.

    July 24, 2014 5 Photos

  • 7-22 Band Camp 1.jpg Band students ‛take over’ MCHS campus

    The Madison Central High School campus has been “taken over” for two weeks by 170 students attending band camp.

    July 21, 2014 6 Photos

  • Dr-Jack-Rutherford.jpg Warning labels needed on energy drinks

    The popularity of energy drinks has soared since they entered the marketplace, but at least one consumer group wants the FDA to order warnings on product labels.

    July 18, 2014 1 Photo

  • Donna-Moberly.jpg Full Gospel ‛Back to School Bash’ is Aug. 2

    Hello everyone.
    I guess everyone is asking, “How much rain did we get?”

    July 17, 2014 1 Photo

  • Katie-Rollins.jpg Thank the Lord for the rain

    Hello readers, it’s a stormy Monday evening as I write this, and I’ve been thanking the Lord all day for the good rain – over an inch in the gauge now, and it looks like more before morning.

    July 17, 2014 1 Photo